Make it count: Day #104

Wednesday, June 24 - Day #104 - AT Hike

Miles Hiked Today - 17.3
Total Miles Hiked on AT - 1440.8/2,193 (65.70%)

Stealth Tentsite (1423.5) to Morgan Stewart Shelter (1440.8) - tent at Morgan Stewart Shelter

Total ascent - 3,512’
Total descent - 2,969’

Total States Completed - 8/14

**No Rain - The best weather day in the past week. Nice breeze throughout the day made the mid-80 temperature feel tolerable.

———

So - today will go down as one of my lowest points on my AT journey. It has improved throughout the day - I was able to talk with my mom and hear from a couple very close friends which has boosted my spirits a bit.

Why was it a low point? Caruso just up and left the trail this morning. It was a STUNNING development. So - last night right at dark - I get out of my tent to go to the bathroom. Caruso got out of his hammock and stated: “Hey - I just wanted to let you know that I’m going to pop off the trail first thing in the morning, grab a rental car, drive to Baltimore, and get a flight back to Atlanta - my AT hike is over”. YOU’RE GONNA DO WHAT? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY? YOU’RE GONNA JUST “POP” OFF THE TRAIL? I absolutely couldn’t believe what I just heard. It was out of nowhere. I inquired: “Why are you leaving?” He stated: “With all the crazy rioting and everything going on - I feel like I need to be home to protect my family”. I instantly thought something had happened in his neighborhood or maybe his family was being threatened or something to cause him to leave the trail immediately. He stated: “There’s no rioting or protesting in my town. Just around the country and in Atlanta - I feel like I need to be there for them”. Then - he just said that the mosquitoes were getting to him and just went back to his hammock. I basically stood there in disbelief.

So - I’m always one to think things through. What he said just didn’t make sense to me. I haven’t been on top of the news - but hasn’t there been protests and rioting going on in the country for a little while now. If nothing is happening in his town - why the urgent fleeing from the trail? Earlier in the day we were talking all about our future plans - how we’re going to finish New York and Connecticut soon. Over dinner - just 2 hours before this bombshell - we were talking about water stops for tomorrow’s hike. Why the change of heart?

Listen - I realize nobody owes me anything. People can leave the trail - it happens everyday. But we have just walked together for over 3 weeks now. Why the vague response - and why tell me 9 hours before you’re leaving the trail. It actually made me sort of mad. I can’t help my reaction - but I knew he wasn’t being forthcoming and ‘why the quickness of the departure’. I just spent 4 hours in Fort Montgomery laying out a schedule completely based on his needs - with heavier miles and an emphasis on maintaining a tighter budget. I checked out hotels, grocery stores - all stuff that would put us in a good situation.

I started thinking about different things he said - and here’s what I think happened. About 2 weeks ago his wife told him: “This is not the Gucci AT tour - you can’t be spending this much money”. So - after this occurrence - Caruso began constantly talking about “going bigger miles”, “less hotel stays”, and only getting food from grocery stores. He was determined to get this hike done as fast as he possibly could. It’s one of the reasons we left Sherpa Mike - because Caruso wanted bigger miles. Well - him and I started pushing those miles last week. And - we got crushed with the heat and the tough sections. Caruso fell behind on the climbs and was complaining way more than he ever did before. Then - yesterday he was complaining about his wife and a discussion they had earlier in the day. Bottom line - I think he began to realize that he isn’t capable of pushing major miles in the heat and tough terrain. It wasn’t fun anymore and he didn’t want to continue the fight. He was getting pressure from back home (likely talking with his wife after dinner) and he was looking for an out. That’s my take on the situation. He’s a tough guy, former military - you can show no weakness. So - he states he must get home to protect his daughter from the rioters. Sounds good - nobody can question taking care of your family.

So - this morning he and I walked 1.3 miles together to the parking area he was going to be picked up at 8am. I wished him the best and headed down the trail —- ALL ALONE AGAIN.

My AT journey has mimicked real life so much it’s almost scary. You meet people all the time. You become friends with several of them. Friends come and go in your life. There’s daily challenges. You have long days, you have short days. If you show up each and every day and just keep efforting - you usually can get places you want to go. Sustained hard work can lead to high achievements. Life and the AT - could be an awesome term paper.

Specifically- how the relationships come and go - it’s crazy. If I think back on the first 104 days of my hike - I’ve spent significant hiking days with a lot of people - Chickweed, Cambyr, 2-can, Empty Space, Jet, Lost Poles, Caruso, Sherpa Mike, Pine Sticks, Spice, Colby — and these are just recent people and I’m not even giving any effort here. The list would be 30+ of people I hiked several hours with at some point on this journey.

Anyway - I wanted to tell the story. So - I’m here at the Morgan Stewart Shelter. There’s 3 other people here tonight. I had dinner with Flipper - she’s a 60-year old from Florida. She’s been section hiking the AT for 15 years. She does 2 hiking trips a year to the AT. She’s done the trail in order - so she has the same number of miles to go as me. It was fun talking with her. I’m really glad somebody was here tonight.

So - tomorrow I’ll get up and strap on my trail runners and head out alone to complete my journey. Who will I meet next? What’s my next adventure?

I just wanted to say real quick how much I truly appreciate the very true friends and family members I have in my life. Today’s situation made me feel really bad. Obviously - Caruso did not look at me as much of a friend. I hope all of you know you can talk with me always - with no judgement. I have lots of issues myself - it’s not so fair to judge others harshly when you got your own problems. A true friend should be someone you can confide in and feel comfortable with that discussion. I think that’s what makes an acquaintance into a true friend.

Stay strong and healthy out there!